Why Supportive Friends Become Unsupportive : Living With Mental Illness Forum

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  • Added: March 11, 2019

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Why Supportive Friends Become Unsupportive : Living With Mental Illness Forum

Living with mental illness is not easy. I suffer from OCD, so I know this to be true. But how do I feel when my depressed friends constantly come to me for support? It doesn’t make things easier. In the last year, I had to drop 2 friends of mine who suffer from mental issues. Why did I change from a supportive “great” friend to an unsupportive person? Here’s why:

1. The constant need for attention. Sure, we all want to be supported when things are rough. But my two friends didn’t know when enough was enough. The daily phone calls, the endless text messages, and constant need for attention becomes overwhelming.

2. The fact that I’m not a therapist. A great friend is there when you need them. But to rely on me as the sole person to come to when things go awry is too much to put on me, especially when I have my own mental state to care for.

3. Coming to me only when times are tough. It’s nice that I’m able to lift the moods of my depressed friends, but where are they when things are going good? They’re nowhere to be found.

4. Not being there when I’m going through an episode. This is a biggie for me. I found it interesting how my “friends” constantly forgot the mental issues I was having too. As if the whole world revolved around them.

5. Not following my advice and then expecting me to listen to the same repetitive mistakes. Of course I don’t expect my friends to follow my advice. But to expect my support when all their actions prove they don’t want to get better is ridiculous.

I understand friends are suppose to support one another, but we all have our own lives, too.

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